If we have animals in our lives, no one is immune from the pain of losing them. Our hearts broke when we let our beloved Oliver Monkey kitty go on July 3, 2023. What we originally thought was a tooth issue turned to shock and devastation when we learned it was a growth under his tongue-- Squamous Cell Carcinoma.
​
In other words, cancer.

The treatments came with a poor prognosis and would have given us only a few months, at best. We felt it would be inhumane to subject him to that, despite us desperately wanting to hold onto our beloved friend and companion. We brought him home, sharing almost every moment together, creating countless pics and videos, and repeating how much we love him.

In his 14 years, our very sweet, extremely curious, playful, and loving Monkey loved nothing more than head boops and head kisses. His original name was Oliver, but after his antics as a kitten, his name changed to Monkey. He was so attuned to us and dog-like and he wanted to be near us at all times. He would do his rounds of the house, checking on things to make sure all was good. He would look at us with a gaze that almost looked as though he was studying us. He loved his rope scratchers and would knead the air when he’d flop over on his back. It looked like he was waving. The only time we ever heard him hiss was at a broom.

I was in the middle of writing my book, “Healing Your Heart After Pet Loss,” when we lost him. This furthered my intention of creating a book to guide people through their agonizing pain. Losing an animal is still stigmatized, despite the fact that for some people, losing an animal can be as difficult as losing a person. Part of my Life’s work is to continue to validate and create space for this grief and help us find ways to heal and honor our beloved animals.

Closure is a myth when it comes to grief. We don’t get over it, we get through it and we carry it with us. As we heal, it becomes a part of us and we integrate it into our Life’s story. Please cherish every moment you have with loved ones. We really never know how long we have.

Monkey, we know you have met up with your brother, Bubby, and the two of you are back playing together again. Just be careful of the mutual bunny kicking. Luckily, neither one of you ever accidentally scratched the other’s eye. But, it sure got close.

He was, and will remain, our Little Gray Man. I often say that our animals look to us, look out for us, and then look over us. I know he’s doing this now, as he often did from the top of the stairs.  He was our guardian then and is now our guardian angel.